BEDA 30: MOTION PASSED

I move that I postpone my letter to tomorrow when I am not cram writing a 25 page research paper that is due tomorrow.

Anyone second the motion? I second!

All in favor, say aye. AYE!

Motion passed!

Okay, I will read my 2013 letter tomorrow and write my 2014 letter tomorrow as well.

Meanwhile, enjoy this amazing picture of a giraffe that I absolutely love and always brings a smile to my day--YOU ARE WELCOME.

I Just Got a Really Crazy Mind to Clean, Know What I Mean?

It's the last day of BEDA...

What?

Tell me, where did April go? 

Like, who took her. What did they do to her. Is she safe. Is she okay. Someone needs to do something because this is a crime. 

Ugh. I can't believe another month is gone. Like, Also, we just started this quarter but we only have four weeks left after this week. Like, what.

No.

I refuse that.

Also, it was hot today. It really is confusing my body. I don't really know what to do about it. My legs are happy cause they haven't had jeans on in like a few days. They are welcome. 

I don't even know. I'm struggling with math homework right now. 

I'm just trying to enjoy the weather basically. Also the fact that this year is almost over makes me want to enjoy it as best as I can, but I'm also too busy but not busy but BUSY, ya know what I mean? 

Anyway, this April was fun. I got back from Florida. I saw my family. I had an awesome birthday. I went to Chicago. I had a lot of fun. Got a lot of things done. Glad I got to share it with you guys.

Anyway, it's time for me to go, once again. I don't even know what my life is anymore. 

Why Today Was Awesome: HOT

Books Read: 5 

Times Eaten At Chipotle: 17 

Airplanes Riden: 12

Concerts Attended: 5! (9 total)

Lock Me Up

Hey guys!

It was hot today.

It made no sense. Like. What?

Also, the second it gets warm, everyone decides that it's time to get naked, so in the quad, just naked people everywhere. I mean, I guess sun isn't a luxury for these people, so they have to take all that they can get.

But yeah, it was nice. We went downtown and then to this beach/park place that was really nice. Did some wilderness adventuring and such. It was a fun time all around. 

It's supposed to reach the 80's tomorrow. My body honestly doesn't even understand what that means. Like. What. Ugh. Mainland and your stupid weather patterns. 

I actually have a lot of stuff due and a lot of things that need to get done, but I've just not been caring. We'll see how that goes. 

Why Today Was Awesome: Hot

Books Read: 5 

Times Eaten At Chipotle: 17 

Airplanes Riden: 12

Concerts Attended: 5! (9 total)

And Now I just Sit in Silence

I forgot to post yesterday and I kept telling myself that it would be okay if I just skipped a day but I literally cannot bring myself to do it....

Anyway, this post is for Monday.

On Monday I went to class. Ate some. Watched Once Upon a Time. Went to work. Ate some more. Downloaded the new Cab EP. Talked about Beyonce tickets. Went to sleep.

Mainly, I just wanted to post this so the number of posts stay pretty. 

I'll talk more today. Yup.  

Why Today Was Awesome: Shorts!

Books Read: 5 

Times Eaten At Chipotle: 17 

Airplanes Riden: 12

Concerts Attended: 5! (9 total)

BEDA 28: Back

But only for a bit! This time, it is Busy Jen!

Let it be know that last year, on this very day, I baked two batches of smores cookies for a group of awesome people who have since become one of the best people I know and love in my life and who have been there for me throughout the highs and the lows.

How about a round of applause for well-deserved cookies huh?

Kendall has written another amazing and sincere letter--he also deserves cookies but I cannot bake right now nor can I send them in a flat rate box. Sorry Kerms, but know that you are also cookie-worthy!

Try to Love Me and I'll Try to Save You

(Note: it's the 27th. The day that I write a letter to my future self. If you want to see my letter to myself from last year, click here). 

Dear Kendall (April 27, 2015)

Hmm. 2015. I don't even know what to say to you. In the past two year's letters, I talking about changing. The first time was when I was in my Senior Year. I was happy with where I was and I didn't want that to change. The next year, things had changed and I think it kind of rattled me. Change is always happening, but that was a point in my life where everything was about change. 

So here I stand, a year later. The change has set in. I will continue to vouch that I am still the same person I was two years ago. I value the same things. I care about the same types of things. It's just that my focus might be a little different now. In the past year, it's not like anything HUGE has happened. No life changing events that could be contained in a 40 minute television episode. But things have changed. 

I've grown in the past year, personally and towards others. I've found something that means more to me than I could have ever imagined and I want to share those feelings with the world. I've settled in, created my roots. No, I haven't done a lot in the department of helping others, but that's why I'm hopeful for you. I'm here. I've done what I've always been afraid of. I've found people who love and support me. And I can love and support myself. 

In the next year, I want to see you slay. You are here for a reason and I only can expect the best. Yes, I hope that you still go to concerts on concerts, eat as much Chipotle as possible, read as many books as you can, spend as much time with friends and family, and relax a little to. But more than that, I want to see you be proud of what you've done. I want you to create. I want you to spread goodness. I want you to live up to the potential that you have been creating for yourself. 

This past year has been one that I will not forget and I only can hope to say the same about the next. 

Love,

Kendall (April 27, 2014)

Why Today Was Awesome: Chipotle AND Kona Kitchen! 

Books Read: 5 

Times Eaten At Chipotle: 17 (hehehehe)

Airplanes Riden: 12

Concerts Attended: 5! (9 total)

I Bet a Lot of Me Was Lost

Okay. 

Yeah. Saturday. That was a day that happened. 

I was with my aunt. We went to the movies. I came back and then we all went over to Bianca's house for a cute family dinner and it was really nice and fun. 

That's all you get. Yup. 

Why Today Was Awesome: Family Dinner
Books Read: 5 

Times Eaten At Chipotle: 16

Airplanes Riden: 12

Concerts Attended: 5! (9 total)

Fresh Start Fever

Hey guys!

Umm today I did a lot. And not really. Class. Library. Class. Work. I got two of my midterms back and I killed both of them. Like, what? Kendall doing well in class? Since when? 

Oh, I downloaded this thing on my phone to let me play gameboy games. It's bad.

I'm at my aunt's house right now. It's a fun time I guess. I don't have much to say. I'ma go know. BAI!

Why Today Was Awesome: Phone Pokemon
Books Read: 5 

Times Eaten At Chipotle: 16

Airplanes Riden: 12

Concerts Attended: 5! (9 total)

You're an Angel Fallen Down Won't You Tell Us of the Clouds

I feel sharey today. Like a show and tell kind of day. It's gonna be narcissistic, but too bad. I can do what I want. 

I'm gonna show you guys my wall today cause I'm kind of proud of it. 

This is my Doctor Who corner. I bought the "11 out of eleven doctors..." poster last year and I really like it. The other poster, my roommate Kenny bought for me for Christmas. For a long time it was giving me a lot of trouble staying up. Let me just say that it isn't fun to wake up to 11 doctors coming for your face. (My pillows and stuff are right below this). 

Next begins the concert section with some assorted others. Here are where all 9 of my concert tickets are. I keep them all and they make me happy to look at. Underneath are two of my Panic! at the Disco CDs. The one of the right is "Too Weird To Live, Too Rare To Die" which is their new album that came out recently. The one on the left is one that I found at a record store and I thought it was cool. On top is the poster that Jen bought me last year without telling me about it and it caused some confusion but I love it. Then is the swings poster that I bought last year also. I love that poster cause I love that part in the book and it's just kind of perfect. Last is the "Let's Be Alone Together" shirt. Funny story. At the first Fall Out Boy concert I went to in September (notice how I say first) I bought this shirt cause I liked it. I came to find out that it was a girls shirt. So, I decided to put it on my wall. I am shocked yet extremely appreciative that it has not moved an inch since I put it up at the beginning of the year. 

As we continue, we can see more concert things. On top is the New Politics (February)  setlist that I managed to catch (hehehe). Then the We the Kings  (March) setlist that I was given and then I got signed by all the members at the meet and greet. Next to it is a Zelda poster that I got for free from Nintendo over winter break. The foam finger is something I got from a Seattle Sounders game (soccer) earlier this year.  I really like it. Underneath is a little info/time schedule thing that I stole from the merch table at the Panic! at the Disco concert in January cause, you know, YOLO. Then next to that is a box top from Taco Bell that has a bunch of bands on it. Then under that is a copy of AP Magazine that has Brendon Urie on the cover. Last are my two twenty one pilots albums. The one on the left is their original, self-titled album. The one on the right (I'm mad that you can't see it in this picture) is their new album, Vessel. (I may or may not have a problem when it comes to band stuff...) 

This is my friend/picture wall. It worked out perfectly with the number of pictures. The thing in the middle is a map of where all of our friends go to college. (It still may or may not have an arrow that points Jen to DC...). This is right above my desk so I get to look up at it when I'm working and it's the best. 

Last is this corner. On top is a New Politics poster that I stole from a restaurant a while back. (I know I know don't judge me. It had been there for months and they just have a bunch of posters on their walls and I was like, I want it, so I took it.....). Under that, on the left is a photo booth picture with my aunt from the Xbox One launch. The post it that says "Make a Difference" was from a board in one of my buildings here that had a bunch of these post its that said good things and it said to take one. The next one is a name tag that was from the day that I shadowed my aunt's boss. It was crazy. That red circle was not there when I put it on in the morning, then I looked down at the end of the day and it was there. The last name tag was from some event that I just kept. 

I know it's small and kind of eh. I hope to do a lot better next year. I even have more posters that I can't even put up because my wall space is so limited. I just thought I would show you guys though, to document what my wall looks like. It's a fun time. Yup. 

Why Today Was Awesome: Nappy Nap
Books Read: 5 

Times Eaten At Chipotle: 16

Airplanes Riden: 12

Concerts Attended: 5! (9 total)

BEDA 23: I Keep Telling Myself

that it might be just easier for everyone if I spared you all from my boring posts and thus not post anything at all. But that feels so wrong....

I am sorry guys, especially to Kermit, that my heart hasn't really been into blogging lately. I have been going through some stuff and I am dealing with it. To add to it though school is actually not as busy save for a couple of group papers due and some events wrapping up but still. 

I will be fine. Just need time.

There's a Hole in my Soul and I Can't Fill It

Hey guys!

Sometimes I forget that this is an actual place for me to come and voice my thoughts, opinions, feelings, and literally just anything. I tend to think of this as more of a chore than as a place for us to talk and interact and discuss actual things. 

But only to add to the paradox that is, I don't have much to talk about. I sometimes find myself looking back at old blog posts. It's nice to see what I was doing at that time in my life or the thoughts I had or how I felt at that moment. It's weird and it's interesting. Nostalgia is a weird thing. 

I really don't know what I'm trying to get at here. Sometimes I get too focused on myself and what's happening in my life to remember all the good and positive things I have around me. That's not good. I'm extremely fortunate and it's something that I hope to never forget. 

Why Today Was Awesome: Plans
Books Read: 5 

Times Eaten At Chipotle: 16

Airplanes Riden: 12

Concerts Attended: 5! (9 total)

And Your Eyes Drip With Excuse and Someone Lit Your Fuse

Dang it. 

I'm 46 minutes late. 

It's not my fault. I was watching this old horror movie with Deme. It was called "Rosemary's Baby". It was weird. 

Now it's time for the sleeps. Waking up at 7:30 every morning is not the biz. (Although I really shouldn't complain). 

Why Today Was Awesome: Getting things done
Books Read: 5 

Times Eaten At Chipotle: 16

Airplanes Riden: 12

Concerts Attended: 5! (9 total)

BEDA 22: Why

No.

BEDA 21: Rain

It rained today. I had a sandwich for lunch. I went to the swings.

It's Obviously Best for Them to Turn Their Guns into a Fist

Hey guys. 

I made this today.
Blue means states that I've BEEN TO (like, been to been to)
Green means states that I've been to/through (like, just been in the airport). 

Why Today Was Awesome: COOKIES
Books Read: 5 

Times Eaten At Chipotle: 16

Airplanes Riden: 12

Concerts Attended: 5! (9 total)

You'll Have to Watch Me Struggle From Several Rooms Away

Hey guys.

I'm just super behind on life. Yup.

Should be studying for my midterm. Instead, making gifs. It's kind of a problem sometimes. 

Why Today Was Awesome: Pancakes? Sure.
Books Read: 5 

Times Eaten At Chipotle: 16

Airplanes Riden: 12

Concerts Attended: 5! (9 total)

BEDA 20: Broken

Happy Easter y'all. Yep it was Easter.

Every Night I Try My Best to Dream Tomorrow Makes it Better

Hey guys!

Ooops. I'm like a day late on these. Oh well.

Saturday was cool. Basically, we got up early, went to the Willis Tower, which is the tallest building in the Western Hemisphere apparently. 103 floors. It was cool cause it was a nice day and we got to see four states apparently. 

Then we went to a record store for Record Store Day. 

Ate some Chipotle.

Touched Lake Michigan.

Then went back to the airport.

In the two plane rides that we had to take and two airports that we had to go, we had four smoothies. 

Yup.

Worth it.

We also got Taco Bell and Panda Express. 

Don't worry, we also got some local food while we were in Chicago. We had this really good pasta. 

Also, I was in between these two ladies in one of the flights. They almost got into a fight and I was prepared to stop them. It was a good time. They were fighting cause one lady was watching a hockey game and she was yelling at it. 

Okay. Yeah. That's what you get.

When you let your heart win.

Ugh. 

Why Today Was Awesome: Chicago fun times
Books Read: 5 

Times Eaten At Chipotle: 16

Airplanes Riden: 12

Concerts Attended: 5! (9 total)

BEDA 19: Busy Saturday

Herrroooo!

I had a busy Saturday today. I woke up at 6:30 (I know! On a Saturday!) and I had Mortar Board Officer Training at 9. Well, no, Shayne had officer training at 9. Mine started at 11, but it was at Hawaii Kai and Shayne was driving so I had to go with her that early. It was at a really fancy beachfront Hawaii Kai house. I lose beachfront loosely, because really there wasn't much beach. It had a view of Diamond Head on the right, and Koko Head on the left, and there was a backyard with a pool and then a rock wall that dropped right into the ocean. And some rocks. And schools of fishies! Oh and there was lots of booze. 

Anyway, after that finished, we had to skip the social that followed after that training sessions, skedaddle back to campus for another "training session" for the mentorship program that I am going to be a part of in the Fall! Yay! That was good. 

Then Shayne and I were starving so we went to grab food in Manoa. I had pho. It wasn't good pho. I should have listened to Brandon when he told me about that place. The broth needed to be doctored up, sadly.

And then we came home and I watched another movie whilst updating spreadsheets, and sending tons of emails. And also ordering food. I feel like whenever I do work for my clubs and organizations I am always trying to figure out food. 

Okay well, that is about it. I am vidchatting the Boyfriend because he is at his sister's house and he has temporary Internet!

Risks Taken: 65
Kimchi Count: 13

They Feel They Have No Control Over Their Prisoner Cells

Hey guys!

Yeah, sorry I'm not sorry for not posting last night. That just wasn't happening. Wanna know why? Cause I went to my third twenty one pilots show and it was everything. 

We got to the venue at about 10 in the morning (after taking the subway which was really cool actually). It was also freezing, like 40s  and really windy. At least it was sunny though. 

It was a fun 8 and a half hours. Met some nice people. Went to target. At some chicken nuggets 

Then, we got in. Even though we still weren't at the very front, we were still  pretty close. 

The first two bands were all right. I mean, we were most focused on the fight. It was kind of an all out war in the pit. But it was fun, cause, you know, we are about that life. 

Then Tyler and Josh came out and it was all over. Ugh. It was so good. I knew what to expect but still, just seeing it in person and experiencing it was amazing. Like, I legit can even describe how perfect it was. Ugh. I know I go to a lot of concerts and do a lot of stuff like this, but twenty one pilots will always be number one and I plan on seeing them as many more times as I can.    

Afterwards, we waited outside for a bit to meet them. Still cold. There were a lot of people and they needed to leave, so we had to be in a group to take a picture and we didn't have much time to talk to them. So I gave them hugs, told them thank you, and gave them the art and the letter that I made for them. Ugh. I just can't anymore. 

Oh and click HERE if you want to see pictures/videos from that night. 

Why Today Was Awesome: twenty one perfection
Books Read: 5 

Times Eaten At Chipotle: 15

Airplanes Riden: 10

Concerts Attended: 5!!!! (9 total)

BEDA 19: Time to Sleep

Busy full day
Will blog tomorrow

-----------

Hi! Friday was a low-key day as I woke up around 9ish, had breakfast with entire family (which hasn't happened in a long while), then I did lots of chores. Cleaned up my shelf, showered, then just kinda did some work. I had lots of emails to send out. Then I had dinner with a couple of friends!

Then I came home and sent more emails while watching a movie. Yep. That was it.

Risks Taken: 65
Kimchi Count: 13

BEDA 18: GAHH FIVE MINUTES LATE!

I haven't had this much fun in a long while. I got home around 11 tonight because I had a meeting at 6pm then after I just went out to dinner with a group of friends. Not everyone in our whole group was there--Alex went home for the weekend, Heide was feeling sick, Bryson went to "go and make some smores" and Duk, of course, is in Hilo, but tonight just kinda proved how lucky I am to have this bunch of crazy people to share everything with--from endless fries to old prom pics to crude jokes. And we just went to dinner! Nothing special, just dinner with friends and yet we were there for a good two hours just talking about the weirdest and punniest things, telling each other outrageous stories, making fun of each other, and laughing our butts off. I haven't laughed like this in a long while. I am really glad I went because this was my first Dumb Shhh Thursday, albeit it was the tamest DST ever. But still! It counts! So I got home, showered, and got down to business--tackling emails every day is always a daunting task, but it is done!

Honestly We're Probably More Suicidal Than Ever Now

Hey guys!!

I'll format these later. Wanna know why? CAUSE IM IN CHICAGO?!??!??

First of all. What the hell is Chicago. It makes little sense. Jaime and I left this morning. We stopped in Minneapolis first. Before today I had no clue what state that was even in. But now I can say that I've been to Minnesota. That's cool. Also, the airport had a lord of the rings pinball machine and a subway. So. Success. 

Then we made it to Chicago. We took a train to downtown where our hotel was. We got here and it was already like 7. But we started walking around and it was really weird and amazing. Everything is gigantic and pretty. And it wasn't even that cold. 

Then we found our way to the bean sculpture. I think I pictures it to be bigger but it just seemed smaller because everything else around it is so freaking huge. After that we ate and now we are back to sleep. 

I would tell you why we are here but it's a suprise. But honestly, you should be able to figure it out. 

Why Today Was Awesome: CHICAGO
Books Read: 5 

Times Eaten At Chipotle: 15

Airplanes Riden: 10 (ugh)

Concerts Attended: 4! (8 total)

Your Twisted Mind is Like Snow on the Road

Hey guys!!

Ugh. Today was stressful again. But again. That is alright. Honestly, like, things aren't even that bad. And I'm not and should not be complaining. Why? Cause cool things are happening very soon. I'm actually really nervous. Like, an excited nervous and a scared nervous. All at once. Life, what are you doing? The fact that we are already past halfway done with April. Like. What? That makes no sense. I told you, it would be crazy. I haven't had a minute to breathe, but that's alright. I'm doing things that make me happy and that's good. Or maybe that's just selfish. I don't really know. 

But good things are coming. Get ready. 

Why Today Was Awesome: Busy
Books Read: 5 

Times Eaten At Chipotle: 15

Airplanes Riden: 8 

Concerts Attended: 4! (8 total)

BEDA 16: Silence

Every day, I try to tell myself that I can do anything, as long as I work hard, I care about others, and I try to smile. But there are times when you realize that this is not true all of the time. There are things that happen that leave you speechless and helpless. And it hurts that you cannot do anything to resolve it, much less react. There are things you just cannot comprehend or may not have even expected in any possible world. There are the times that you hate with every fiber of your being, the times that make you want to cry away every single thing that you are thinking about and feeling, and the times that you realize that no amount of cursing or fist-beating can turn back time even if you went on forever. These are the times that all you can really do is hope for even the slightest shade of "okay."

BEDA 15: Floating

I don't feel myself today. I am happy, but for some reason I don't feel motivated to write a blog post today. Sorry guys.

Our Brains Are Sick But Thats Okay

Hey guys!

Not gonna lie, today was actually really stressful. Aside from the fact that I had class and work. I had a meeting for work for something that has been really stressful and I'm nervous about. I'm missing two days of school this week so I have to make sure that I make up everything that will be due. I have about a billion things to do in terms of my personal life. I have to prepare for things and deal with things. And on top of that, someone I respect and look up to (who I rarely even talk to) said that they wanted MY advice about something. 

It was stressful.

BUT, it turned out to be what made my day. Talking to him was really cool. I enjoy interacting with him and talking to him, but it rarely happens. On top of that, he is someone who I don't necessarily see as a peer. He is someone above me and the fact that he wanted my advice was scary. But it was really nice. I talked about his life with him. I gave him my thoughts and opinions. Not that I really helped him come to a decision in the end, I feel like it was probably nice to have a different opinion, which I'm glad I could be. It was just kind of humbling and a really really good reminder of why I'm here and what I'm supposed to be doing. Hopefully things will return to that soon. 

Why Today Was Awesome: Barnesie
Books Read: 5 

Times Eaten At Chipotle: 15

Airplanes Riden: 8 

Concerts Attended: 4! (8 total)